If you are a woman and own a hair net or scarf you tie over hair at night before you go to bed, please raise your hand. If you don’t own a hair net or ‘night scarf’ or ‘douk’ as it is called here in South Africa, please move on to the next post. Don’t leave the blog. I love you too much to lose you, but do feel free to check out the previous or next post.
Now to all you other ladies like me who own the infamous hair net, let’s talk.
It has come to my attention that the hair net can be a deal breaker in a relationship. Let me rephrase that: when you are in a relationship with an insensitive and immature douche, your hair net (or hair snood as it is called in some places), night scarf or douk can be a deal breaker because somehow, the hair net with all its interwoven strings can complicate matters between you and your man, and simply overshadow whatever else you bring to the table. The hair net in its own little way can be a magnanimous issue because some people, aka men, just can’t understand why we wear these things.
I don’t know about the rest of you but here’s why I own and wear a hair net: I love weaves; I have a weave on most of the time, and even when I don’t I have some other hair attachment on that is just not comfortable to sleep on. If you intend to debate whether or not I loathe my natural hair, you can do so by checking out my post on natural versus relaxed hair here. Anyway, back to the crux of the matter: I wear a hair net because it is easy sleep without having strands of hair poking my back or scratching my face. This of course is not the only reason. If you love weaves or have long hair, protecting that hair from drying out and experiencing friction with your pillow is one of the main reasons a hair net or a night scarf would be beneficial. And sometimes with my twelve hour days that sometimes begin at 5:00am, having a hair net or scarf on means I can brush my hair and pin it in place the night before, so I don’t have to stress about styling it the next morning when I need to rush out of my home before rush hour traffic hits.
Why the long story? Some men are of the opinion that a woman who owns and wears a hair net to bed deserves to be cheated on. Simply put, they make it clear that men in relationships with such women deserve a sexy side chick that looks like Eva Longoria or Penelope Cruz. Whether these women own hair nets or scarves they tie to bed is a question for the gods and professional stalkers, but I daresay it is an immature and rather myopic perspective on the part of men who think along these lines. So your woman wears a hair net? So what? What exactly does it deduct from a man to see his woman in a hair net? Sure, it makes her look a bit more plain than she does during the day, and perhaps gives a more realistic image of her natural looks, but isn’t that the point of bed time?
Bed time for me is a personal ritual; I shower, wash off every bit of makeup on my face, brush my teeth, floss it and reach for my hair net. The whole point of sleeping is to get rest- rest from the front I have to put on to the whole world when I step out the door. My home and my bed at the end of each day is my sanctuary, my place of vulnerability and tranquility and I certainly do not want long strands of hair getting in my way. I don’t want to wake up with strands of hair all over my pillow either. Yes, I own a Brazilian weave but there’s always that lone strand or a few lone strands that tend to find their way to my pillow. So rather than spend my morning picking hair strands off my bed, I prefer to wear a hair net. Why it should bother my boyfriend or future husband is still a mystery to me.
I have come to the conclusion that men who detest the hair net so much, they’d use it as an excuse to cheat, are the empty and weak barrels who are in love with illusions of women created in the media, much more than they are with real women. These are the men no woman with a hair net should bother dating. Like a very good male friend of mine said “men should put themselves in ladies’ shoes. If we had the same length of hair as women, would we sleep without hair nets on and feel uneasy all night?” #EnoughSaid.
If you are a woman with a hair net or scarf, don’t subject yourself to creating an illusion you cannot uphold. Be proud of your hair net! It has gotten you through nights that would have been difficult in its absence. It was your safe haven when no man was there, and it is still your safe haven even now after a long hard day of hair pins and clips. Except for those steamy nights when you intend to turn up the heat for a special treat *wink wink* don’t give up your hair net for sleepless nights and dark eye circles. Cheers to the hair net! XOXO